Fatboy Slim – “The Rockafeller Skank”

When: January 1999
Where: My grandma’s house
Who: Nobody
Weather: Unknown

I didn’t know Rachel Leigh Cook by name, but she has a lot to answer for in terms of premature sexual frustration. Observe:

When I was nine, that was sexy. Cook was the star of She’s All That, my generation’s obligatory adaptation of Pygmalion. Ironically, it’s the pre-makeover Cook that I find more attractive, what with the frumpy clothes and cute glasses. It certainly stands as a contrast to the nascent style of the time: Women had to look like strippers and men had to look gay. Our problems began long before 9/11.

Add this to the fact that my friends were still virulently anti-girl. I had no such experience, except maybe during high school. The song is irrelevant; it only convinced my young self that when the year 2000 came, I may not belong there.

Next: The search for original music gets Nintendo-hard.

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